Welcome to OnStar

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Oh.....the OnStar lady, and her liquid voice. Thankfully I've never had to use it for an emergency, only for making calls. I'm convinced smoke signals or a carrier pigeon would be a faster, more efficient system. By the time I get Ms. OnStar to understand me, I'm ready to reach into the space from which her voice comes and wring her sexy little neck.

Welcome to OnStar....

Dial

Phone Number to Dial Please....(she's polite)

555-1234


896234897512365, yes or no.......?

No

I'm sorry....? (she's so VERY polite)

NO

Slower please.....(ENOUGH WITH THE MANNERS!!)

NoooooOOOooooooahhhh


Okay, Let's try again....

So I give her another chance, and try to articulate each number precisely as she does, thinking she will understand because I'm speaking her language

five.  five.  five.  one.  two.  three.  four.


Slower please....


Arrrrrhgghghghhhh!!!!


Thank You, Goodbye.

She hung up on me. She hung up on me?!

Comments

Rebecca said…
HA!!! I Hate onStar lady. My kids laugh every time I try to make a call.. on the plus side, they memorized EVERYONES phone number and can recall them at will - just because of onStar lady.
2/17/2010
Unknown said…
Oh my gosh! I was just writing about this very thing. It makes me crazy, but my son finds it hilarious. I'm glad one of us does. LOL!
6/23/2010
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