The only vegetable I'd say I don't like. Kid Two doesn't like them either. That's why he tried to pawn them off on ME! ;-) "Oh....mom needs to see better...."
Here's why we're not getting a dog....or a hermit crab or sea monkeys. If you follow these postings you know we have cat. He lives outside. While he is clever and resourceful at finding things to munch on, we do feed him. Well... I feed him. And that brings me to my point. It's been at least a week since one of the kids has feed EL Gato. I've been doing the job. Kid one is online, saving the world from zombies. Kid two is organizing his toy buckets. "Ummm...did anyone feed Oreo today?" Or yesterday or the day before or EVER??? Silence. I can hear their thoughts knocking around in their heads.... Finally, kid one is brave enough to speak. " I did it the other day." Ahhh...yes. Let the finger pointing begin . Not wanting to be left out of the carnival game, kid two throws in his buck fifty. "Well, I do it all the time." Really??? Cuz I'd bet my next hair appointment that you are bot...
The last time I cleaned my house, it was June. I've been away for a while. Today was the first day of school. Everyone got scooted out the door in record time. Go Us! I stood in my empty, quiet house. and took it in. Not the empty silence....the DUST . Oh for the love of Pledge. The sunlight is peeking through the shutters, casting fancy little rays of pixie dust all around the room. I can see where the kids have "tagged" their names. Kid One Was Here. (smiley face) Wash me. Kid Two. Clever, aren't they? In my mind, I imagine myself in a Mary Poppins like state. Dusting. Moping. Twirling about... Decked out in my best apron. Talking to the birds. Instead, I put on Dr. Dre, and bust a move, starting with the couch. Did you know that a couch is the Bermuda Triangle of the furniture world? In there I found: The mail key. Cheetos. A pencil. Three pens. The remote. $2 in change. A glow stick. A poker chip. A bookmark. Awesome. Dre ...
Oh.....the OnStar lady, and her liquid voice. Thankfully I've never had to use it for an emergency, only for making calls. I'm convinced smoke signals or a carrier pigeon would be a faster, more efficient system. By the time I get Ms. OnStar to understand me, I'm ready to reach into the space from which her voice comes and wring her sexy little neck. Welcome to OnStar.... Dial Phone Number to Dial Please....( she's polite ) 555-1234 896234897512365, yes or no.......? No I'm sorry....? ( she's so VERY polite ) NO Slower please.....( ENOUGH WITH THE MANNERS!! ) NoooooOOOooooooahhhh Okay, Let's try again.... So I give her another chance, and try to articulate each number precisely as she does, thinking she will understand because I'm speaking her language five. five. five. one. two. three. four. Slower please.. .. Arrrrrhgghghghhhh!!!! Thank You, Goodbye. She hung up on me. She hung up on me ?!
Comments
The only vegetable I'd say I don't like.
Kid Two doesn't like them either.
That's why he tried to pawn them off on ME! ;-)
"Oh....mom needs to see better...."
While that IS true, he is very clever!