Wilderness Camping-Sarcasm Edition by J.P.S.
Laying in the tent at 2 am in the middle of BFE...I begin to slowly loose my mind think.... An owl REALLY does say "Who". Your appreciation for running water increases 10 fold when you have access to none. Meat bees sting. Sometimes they tell 5 of their friends, who follow suit. Fellow campers who snore should have their morning coffee privileges revoked! It's 3 am....chanting, silently, "a bear won't eat me, a bear won't eat me, a bear won't eat me", only makes you CONVINCED you just heard one. I like beach camping. I'm pretty certain I won't be eaten by a sea turtle. When squatting to make a nature call, be aware of your surroundings. You know....no poison oak, no killer ant hills, no sticks poking straight up out of the ground. "Bears" shit in the woods. By the end of day two, you become accustomed to your new "scent". Also, by the end of day two, you qualify as a "Glamou