Life According to Me

You can always tell the gym rat who's music is far too loud in his ears. He's the one grunting like a wounded animal and loud whisper counting his reps. I only noticed this because I had forgot my own headphones. So I settled for some 80's pop the gym generously pumps into the atmosphere. Taaaaaake ooooooon meeeeeee. take on me.... As I'm eliptical-ing my way to nowhere, I can hear the guy beside me, apparently peddling his way up Mount Kilimanjaro. I know this because not only is he standing up on the bike, he's grunt-yelling his little heart out to the theme from Rocky. I know THIS because his music is so loud in his ears,   I can hear it. This got me thinking. I listen to my music pretty loud. My pony-tail's a-swingin'. I listen to the theme from Rocky.  Gulp.....

Dear Baristas, Is it really necessary to make me feel like a complete imbecile for ordering my coffee incorrectly? I know there's a special way to do it, but when it's my turn, I have a complete brain fart. I know when I say "iced" at the end, after you've written everything on a hot cup, you get your little barista chonies in a wad. Or when I say "whipped cream" instead of "whipped" you're calculating the time I've wasted by using that whole word. I really appreciate you, I hope you know. How would I get through my day without your skilled artistry of delicious coffee concocting?! All I ask is for your eyes to stay put when I say "non-fat" instead of "skinny". When you roll them so dramatically, it makes me want to pull your lip ring out with a fish hook. So, in order to have a more civil relationship, I will practice my ordering technique if you will keep your heavy sighs of disdain to your self....deal? Ad